G.T.L. is Finally Back

Everyone has been psycho-analyzing Lebron going to Miami. I finally know why he made the decision that he did. He took his talents to south Beach so he could be closer to the Jersey Shore meatheads without actually being in Jersey (wait, did I just bash my own home state). Think about it, though. LeBron wants to be a global icon. What better way to accomplish this than to align himself with the Jersey Shore guys? America loves to hate villains. You can become hugely famous in this country simply by being infamous. If I'm LeBron and I want to go to the next pantheon in celebrity, I decide to align myself with the jersey Shore guys. Can you imagine if he played alongside Wade and Bosh during the day and then partied with Ronnie, Vinny, Paulie D and The Situation at night?? I'm pretty sure Skip Bayless' head would explode. Literally.

I am not going to lie. I will not apologize or what I am about to say: I watch the Jersey Shore and I love it. I hate those meatheads yet I love those meatheads. I'm not sue what it is but I find myself caring about what they are going to do. I am super excited for the new season.

The only problem I see is that they are all now celebrities. Even if you don't watch the show (shame on you D-Lib, J-Will, C-Steb, Hopper, T-Gasp, etc) you know who these guys are. Girls that get together with The Situation aren't doing so to simply get laid by a disgusting pig of a man. They are doing so because he's a celebrity. That takes a lot of the excitement out of it all. Same thing with Ronnie. I bet there are tons of guys lining up to kick his ass. All he has to do is walk into a bar if he wants to get into a fight. He's doesn't even have to try. Talk about being lazy.

With all that being said, I'm really excited about the season. Angelina is back. (Everyone hates her which of course should lead to some hair pulling and drink spilling.) Fist pumping is back. Fake tans are back. And of course, the only Jersey girl on the show, Sammi Sweetheart, representing William Paterson University, is back.


And now for my two favorite lines of the night:

Favorite Line #1: J-Woww to Angelina - "You should know about trash. You're from Staten Island."
Favorite Line #2: Ronnie's friend from home - "Sometimes you gotta double bag that shit. You know, put a bag over your head in case hers falls off."